What To Do If You Think Your Friend Is About To Marry The Wrong Person

Friends don’t let friends marry total jerks. But what if speaking up about the engagement ends up costing you the friendship?

Outside of being that person who shouts “I object!” mid-ceremony, it’s hard to know how to handle the situation. Is it ever OK to voice your reservations earlier on ― or is that bound to lead to a best friend breakup?

We’ve got answers for you. Below, friendship and etiquette experts share their best advice on broaching the subject before the Big Day.

1. Remember: Your friend is marrying this person, not you.

You may find your friend’s fiancé’s habit of mansplaning insufferable. She might chalk it up to him being opinionated, one of the the qualities that initially drew her to him.

The reality is, you’re not going to have to put up with this guy till death do you part (or until the divorce) ― your friend is. Keep that firmly in mind before speaking up, said Irene S. Levine, a professor of psychiatry at the New York University School of Medicine and the author of Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend.

“What may not look good to you, as an outsider, might be very gratifying to your friend. Their needs and values may not be the same as yours,” she said. “Allow for the possibility that you’ve misjudged the partner. Give yourself and your friend the gift of time; try to get to know him better.”



Source : Hhuffingtonpost