After 10 Years, Here’s Why I’m Over Online Dating

Ten years is a really long time to be single. It’s also a good amount of time to see the natural evolution of a thing. Since I was born in 1982, online dating is one thing I’ve gotten to observe.

I’ve seen online dating evolve from lengthy profile setups that took hours if not professional help to complete, to simply importing Instagram photos with zero information required of you or offered to the swiping party. Even the effort we put in to join online dating has become a pittance, so it’s no wonder the participants have become such passive, jaded swipers with attention spans that last the length of time we spend on the toilet.

Yes, I am aware that you have a co-worker whose best friend met her husband on Tinder, like, two days after she broke up with her boyfriend of five years. We’re all very happy for Jessica.

But in 10 years (that’s 3,650 days, kids), all that I’ve ever done is swipe through faces, go on bad dates or go on good dates that have led to literally nothing at all. The third option is rare enough to count with the fingers you have available while holding a Starbucks.

And now, 10 years into being single, I do not have any interest in playing the game. And I don’t think it’s just me. I think I’m witnessing the decline of online dating to the point of its inevitable demise.

The illogical nature of online dating has always perplexed me. It took the far-fetched notion of love at first sight and made it something you were supposed to be able to find with your thumb.

The notion of “matching” with someone is the most cursory exploration of compatibility imaginable, and it’s only gotten more superficial over time. There is nothing, and has never been anything, about online dating that actually connected two people.

Any time I’ve been in a relationship with someone (we’ve acknowledged that hasn’t happened in a while), it’s happened because attraction and friendship were allowed to develop over time. Online dating is the microwave version of relationships, and I’m the underdone burrito with an icy center that nobody wants.

First dates in the online dating world aren’t dates. In the IRL dating world, two people are often acquainted, at least in some loose capacity, before dating, which creates, if not a respect, then a fear of consequences. Online daters have never been burdened by this.

Source: huffingtonpost